https://aimeru.com/blog.html Relationships, family systems, and the patterns no one told you were there. Essays by Dirk Harms-Merbitz. en-us aimeru · 2026 aimeru@aimeru.com (Dirk Harms-Merbitz) aimeru@aimeru.com (aimeru) Wed, 20 May 2026 00:00:00 GMT aimeru https://aimeru.com/og-default.png https://aimeru.com/blog.html https://aimeru.com/blog/solidarity.html https://aimeru.com/blog/solidarity.html Wed, 20 May 2026 00:00:00 GMT Dirk Harms-Merbitz Female Intrasexual Competition Cultural Script Evolutionary Psychology Female intrasexual competition rarely arrives looking like competition. It arrives looking like kindness. A structural account of how the cultural script targets the women least able to filter it. https://aimeru.com/blog/whatwelearn.html https://aimeru.com/blog/whatwelearn.html Wed, 22 Apr 2026 00:00:00 GMT Dirk Harms-Merbitz Attachment Theory Relationships Psychology Your partner isn't your problem. They're your teacher. The nervous-system science behind anxious and avoidant attachment, why standard couples therapy makes it worse, and what actually works. https://aimeru.com/blog/engine.html https://aimeru.com/blog/engine.html Sun, 12 Apr 2026 00:00:00 GMT Dirk Harms-Merbitz Mitochondria Cognition Lineage She carries the engine. He shops for shields and fuel. The story we tell about reproduction has been running on borrowed power for ten thousand years. https://aimeru.com/blog/logfile.html https://aimeru.com/blog/logfile.html Sun, 12 Apr 2026 00:00:00 GMT Dirk Harms-Merbitz Information Survival Mechanics What survives in DNA is not what was chosen. It is what was not eliminated. Two channels, two timescales, one filter that has been running for hundreds of millions of years. https://aimeru.com/blog/whatworked.html https://aimeru.com/blog/whatworked.html Sun, 12 Apr 2026 00:00:00 GMT Dirk Harms-Merbitz Energy Game Theory Behavior Nobody chose them. They survived because the alternatives didn't. The behavioral patterns of men and women as energy-allocation strategies, optimized for two different survival games. https://aimeru.com/blog/three_channels.html https://aimeru.com/blog/three_channels.html Fri, 10 Apr 2026 00:00:00 GMT Dirk Harms-Merbitz Biology Culture Naming Three channels carry information through time. She owns one. He built another. The naming system tracks neither honestly. https://aimeru.com/blog/shibboleth67.html https://aimeru.com/blog/shibboleth67.html Fri, 10 Apr 2026 00:00:00 GMT Dirk Harms-Merbitz Curiosity Belonging Compassion Why is every article low key making fun of a generation. https://aimeru.com/blog/the_attention_recession.html https://aimeru.com/blog/the_attention_recession.html Fri, 10 Apr 2026 00:00:00 GMT Dirk Harms-Merbitz Dopamine Intimacy Presence Why the real crisis isn't sexlessness — it's that nobody is paying attention to anyone anymore. https://aimeru.com/blog/abundance.html https://aimeru.com/blog/abundance.html Fri, 10 Apr 2026 00:00:00 GMT Dirk Harms-Merbitz Abundance Atrophy The Quiet After The self-defeating architecture of a life modern women build to never need anyone. https://aimeru.com/blog/the_courtyard.html https://aimeru.com/blog/the_courtyard.html Fri, 10 Apr 2026 00:00:00 GMT Dirk Harms-Merbitz Longing Performance Retreat A thousand years of men performing for each other instead of walking up the stairs. https://aimeru.com/blog/go_talk_to_her.html https://aimeru.com/blog/go_talk_to_her.html Fri, 10 Apr 2026 00:00:00 GMT Dirk Harms-Merbitz Agency Masculinity The Room The self-inflicted catastrophe of choosing theory over action. https://aimeru.com/blog/narcissisticsystems.html https://aimeru.com/blog/narcissisticsystems.html Fri, 10 Apr 2026 00:00:00 GMT Dirk Harms-Merbitz Systems Roles Patterns How the roles we learned at home follow us to work — and what it takes to see the system clearly. https://aimeru.com/blog/the_open_line.html https://aimeru.com/blog/the_open_line.html Fri, 10 Apr 2026 00:00:00 GMT Dirk Harms-Merbitz Presence Consciousness The Unnamed What technology cannot replicate, and what we lost the vocabulary to name.